Reduce your networking anxiety with these attitude shifts

Going to a networking event can be daunting and overwhelming.

In this edition, I share 3 reminders you can tell yourself before walking into any room.

It will frame your mindset and approach for the event making you feel at ease.

Unfortunately, many networkers arm themselves with the wrong mentality.

Meaning your approach is counterproductive.

Losing before you step foot in the door of the event.

Instead, when the wave of networking anxiety hits, remind yourself of these three points.

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Last week I went to a networking group I haven’t been to since before the pandemic.

I received the guest list before.

Followed the 3 Who’s Framework.

But to my surprise, I knew very few people on the list.

Suddenly, my heart rate started to increase.

Yes, despite running a networking organisation and writing a newsletter about networking, the idea of walking into a room not knowing anyone starts to fill me with anxiety.

And on the walk from the train station to the venue, I reminded myself of 3 principles I network by that put me at ease.

They are:

1. Everyone is there for the same reason

This reminds me what I'm walking into.

A networking event!

So everyone is in the same boat.

And have all decided to be there to meet new people and start conversations.

Reminding myself of this significantly eases the fear of joining and leaving conversations.

Making them much easier to approach and navigate.

Two of the most common challenges with networking I hear.

2. Expect nothing

This frees me of the feeling that I need to get something from it.

Meaning means my approach to conversations is more relaxed.

I drop any kind of sales approach.

I’m not thinking about what I can get from every person, and am less focussed on seeking a specific action from then.

This reminds me that it’s often starting conversations.

Or chance to build on existing ones.

At a minimum, a chance to learn something new.

Networking is often the first date, it's not the wedding.

3. Be curious with an open mind

You never know who someone knows.

This is about not being a short-sighted networker.

It could be a friend, family member, former colleague, teammate etc away from the event that could be an opportunity for you.

Or what you can learn from someone.

Being curious helps me find out something interesting, or an unexpected connection, or piece of information, that could have a significant impact on our connection.

This shifts my approach to find out about others by asking questions and listening to understand.

And you must believe and trust they will do the same with you.

If they don’t reciprocate, move on and see it as a reflection of them.

The Wrap Up

Next time you feel that wave of anxiety ahead of an event, try it.

Find the right moment for you to remind yourself of these before you walk in.

Be it before you get out the car, on the train, as you're approaching the venue, wherever works for you!

Or if need be, take yourself to the bathroom as you arrive. Compose and remind yourself:

1. Everyone is there for the same reason
2. Expect nothing
3. Be curious with an open mind

Or maybe you have your own go to networking principles that'll help shape your attitude and approach.

When you do, framing your mind going into the event with these improves your networking experience.

Thanks to your renewed networking approach.

Happy networking.

P.S. this is one part of the pre-event preparation that forms the 'Networking Event Sandwich Framework' I teach in The Networkers Playbook. The first online course for those new to networking. Or even those looking to improve and learn how to enhance their networking ways.